I recently rejected someone who rejects me consistently.
I rejected them before they could reject me again. Why? So I wouldn’t have to feel the pain of rejection.
Jesus was despised and rejected. He understands.
Isaiah 53:3 NLT He was despised and rejected— a man of sorrows, acquainted with deepest grief. We turned our backs on him and looked the other way. He was despised, and we did not care.
Jesus has the right to judge us.
John 5:22 NLT In addition, the Father judges no one. Instead, he has given the Son absolute authority to judge…
As a righteous judge, He says:
Matthew 10:33 NLT But everyone who denies me here on earth, I will also deny before my Father in heaven.
I went outside to put something in our car and a group of my neighbors were chatting in the street. One of these neighbors consistently ignores me even when I smile, wave or say, “Hello.”
When I saw this group, I determined I would just do what I had to do and go back inside without acknowledging anyone; and I did so, quickly.
When I got back inside the house, I literally said to myself, “What was that?! I just treated her the way she treats me; instead of how I want to be treated.” “How do you want to be treated?” I heard the Holy Spirit say. “I want to be smiled at, spoke to or waved at.”
Why did I behave this way? I didn’t want to be rejected. So I took control and rejected first.
The Bible tells us to be controlled by the Spirit- not the flesh.
At that moment, I remembered a devotional I had just heard about godly and ungodly women of the Bible. Which woman was I emulating at that moment? I asked Jesus to forgive me.
A few weeks ago, I went to The Plant City Strawberry Festival. I brought several baskets of fresh strawberries home with me. After putting aside all the strawberries we could possibly eat and more, I still had a few baskets left. I thought of my neighbor- the one who always rejects me. “I bet she would enjoy some of these beautiful strawberries,” I thought. So I asked my husband if he would take some to her. He immediately went to task. When he returned, I couldn’t wait to hear about her response, (sensing this was a God-idea in the first place.) “I scared them to death!” my husband said. (It was just sundown and I guess they couldn’t fathom anyone coming to their door at that time.) “Her husband answered the door and when he realized we were sharing with him he said he was going to have her make him a strawberry pie!” I was all smiles and filled with hope about our next curbside meeting. It has been weeks now and I still haven’t heard a word from her about the strawberries or anything else.
Why did I have my husband go to my neighbor’s house instead of going myself? Fear of rejection.
If my husband dropped off the berries and received an unfavorable response, I would only feel the rejection indirectly. The flip-side of the coin is, if he received a favorable response, I would only feel the acceptance indirectly. (In the place of the word acceptance, you can also put the word, joy.) I was willing to open myself up to indirect rejection, but not direct rejection.
Rejection likes to drive us, doesn’t he?
Whenever I want to go to my neighbor- Fear, (disguised as rejection) says, “Give me the keys. I’ll drive. You know I’m a safe driver. Oh, and after we go to your neighbor, we might stop be Pity Palace or The Valley of Tears. Don’t worry, I’ll get you back before anyone knows you were with me.”
He might not drive you to a neighbor. Maybe he drives you to a former love or former friend or to a relative, boss or co-worker.
But we give him the keys, get in the car and then hide our true feelings, don’t we?
We cry. We feel self-pity and then we go to work building a wall. Because building feels proactive, doesn’t it? We determine to never let that person or maybe any person make us feel rejected again.
The Bible says:
Galatians 5:16 AMP But I say, walk habitually in the [Holy] Spirit [seek Him and be responsive to His guidance], and then you will certainly not carry out the desire of the sinful nature [which responds impulsively without regard for God and His precepts].
In your life, who has the keys? Who is driving you?
In the above allegory, Fear said he was a safe driver. He was right. No one ever gets hurt when he’s driving. No one gets loved either. He even locks the doors when you get in. But guess what? When you decide to say, “Stop the car in the name of Jesus!” He has to let you out and hand you the keys!
My prayer for you and for myself is that we will get out of Fear’s car, take the keys from him and hand them to Jesus. Then we can be become life-long pedestrians, walking in the Spirit!
Oh this is so good. Years ago I would do the same thing turn and walk away. But now NO MORE. I Figure I’m just going to be me. I’m always respectful and kind. Why should I run and hide. And feel funny about it. So like you I smile & wavy and if their close enough I say have a great day. And just keep going, at least I know I’m walking in light. Ps. When you have a few minutes I will tell you a story On this topic. Hopefully you’ll get a chuckle 🤭
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